Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Adoption Update: Meeting 2

First, can I just tell you that Autumn is really perceptive? People keep asking us if we have told Autumn about the potential adoption and want to know why we aren't keeping this a secret. For one, I'm terrible at keeping secrets. Just terrible. And, she kind of knows when things are up. She's Empathy Child. From what we can tell, we've handled the flow of information well. Enough to keep her in the loop but not so much that she's too excited or anxious.

We didn't find out until late last night that we were going to go ahead and meet up with J. We had tentatively planned to get together if the baby hadn't been born. So we didn't really say anything to Autumn about it but not because we were keeping a secret. Now, Mike usually leaves for work around the time Autumn wakes up so he was home since it wouldn't be worth driving to work and then driving to the meeting. It's not totally unusual for that to happen but I guess he hasn't hung out in the morning in a while because as I was loading Autumn up to go to school, she looks up and says, "Are you meeting with Miss J this morning?"

I laughed and asked her how she knew and she just shrugged and said, "Papa's home." So, there you go. That's why we tell her what's going on! I have another funny Autumn story. A few weeks ago, I was saying that I wanted to know if our friend Elyse was having a boy or a girl. Autumn matter of factly stated that Mrs. Elyse is having a boy. She was so certain that I asked how she knew. Did Elyse tell us and I missed it? Again, Autumn just shrugged and said, "It's going to be a boy." And she said it in a "duh" tone of voice.

Three weeks later, Elyse texts me to tell me that it's time to take Autumn to choose lottery numbers. Autumn was right!!

So, yeah. I have an odd kid. I remember when she was little, she'd stare at nothing and really freak out my mom. I told my mom I wasn't worried until she and the cat were looking at the same patch of nothing. Between her weird perceptiveness, guessing the baby gender right, and her dream that Garrett told her that her tooth would be loose Friday (it was Saturday--off by a day), maybe my mom was on to something...

See more on Know Your Meme.

Well. That post went nowhere I expected. I must be more tired than I thought...moving on.

The meeting went well! We ended up spending the first part of it in our car because the birth mother counselor was late. Funny stuff. We talked for about 30 minutes about expectations, potential names, how to introduce J's daughter to the new baby someday, what kind of food J likes. She wants to put the name we choose on the birth certificate so we need to make a decision soonish, I guess. How weird would it be to re-use Nolan Grant and calling him Grant?

We started an adoption process earlier this year and intended to name the baby Grant. The adoption fell through the day before the placement ceremony. That baby is still in interim care and, some time back, we started calling him Jaden, the name his interim care family gave him. We also changed all the blog tags related to that process to Jaden, partly because there was always a chance we'd use the name again. Most everyone likes the name. And I do, too! But it feels a little odd. We're still thinking about it. I can't think of a name I like better. J is pretty much in labor now (she was 3 cm last Wednesday and has been having contractions regularly) so we should decide soon.

A bit of good news, it sounds like the birth father is moving towards signing the papers. That's one of our biggest prayers. Actually, one of the fitness directors has a couple of phrases that she says have been on her mind and both apply here. One, cautious optimism. The other? Peaceful resolution. And, yup, that's what we want here. Peaceful resolution.

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